1 February 2022

We are a little more than four weeks ahead of the performance on February 27 and there are a number of urgent deadlines coming up this week. I’ll dump my anxiety into the PUSH ITEMS (below).
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I am finding that I am more creative and productive with a circle of colleagues that I can talk to about the ideas and notions that are in my head. I don’t think this approach works with everyone, especially composers who tend to be solitary in their creative process. 
And this may be the larger issue that I am thinking about in the long-term. What is it about my creative preferences that puts value on collaboration? It might be a super-power but it also might be my kryptonite. And I’m always trying to find the balance between working in isolation and in a group process. 
Clearly, I’m the active agent driving everything related to the 2/27 Project  FunnyMeanHappySad and so as a “producer” I am working with performers, promoters, and production folks. As the “composer-creator” of the music and the “presenter” or M.C. I also have production aspects:

• collecting and distributing the sheet music,
• audience management and services (design and production of the emoticards, miniature pencils),
• generating the press release (because no one else knows my ideas that can put the words on the page),
• setting the rehearsal schedule and the program’s rundown order,
• and more…

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Overseeing so many aspects is a little daunting and so organizing the commodity of time is critical to success. SO —- what does success look like? Setting goals was probably work that should have been done in a more granular sense weeks/months ago. Knowing what I’m shooting for as the host, creator, composer, producer, promoter and performer still needs to be clearly and thoroughly articulated. There is no time like the present.

What does success look like on March 1, 2022?
As the creator/composer

• Legacy. As I am approaching 70 years, I am thinking of those who will be acquainted with me and my music…after I am gone. What I include on the program will represent only a small percentage of my repertoire so success will…highlight a maximum number of compositions with a minimum number of performers.
• Seven performers: 120 is the multiplier
  • Piano (4): Walden Etude, Ol’ Devil Time, Lover’s Lament, Concerning One Summer
  • Bass (1): A Most Knowing Woman
  • Cello (5): Around Columbia, Ol’ Devil Time, Spring, Simple Gifts, Chamber Music
  • Viola (3): Around Columbia, Simple Gifts, Chamber Music
  • Violin (3): Around Columbia, Simple Gifts, Chamber Music
  • Oboe, English horn (6): Ol’ Devil Time, Spring, Lover’s Lament, A Most Knowing Woman, Simple Gifts, Chamber Music
  • Soprano (4): Simple Gifts, Ol’ Devil Time, Spring, Lover’s Lament
• Nine compositions: 90 running minutes
  • Simple Gifts (complete) 4 minutes
  • Walden Etude; Perpetual Motion (complete) 3 minutes
  • Around Columbia; Mexico-Bolivar Tango (complete) 5 minutes
  • A Most Knowing Woman (complete) 12 minutes
  • Spring from the Plymouth tapestries (complete) 4 minutes
  • Lover’s Lament or Martha Kaemmer’s Deploration (complete) 4 minutes
  • Chamber music (for these distracted time) (complete) 15 minutes
  • Pete Seeger’s Ol’ Devil Time (complete) 6 minutes
  • Concerning One Summer - (excerpt, finale) 7 minutes
• Demonstrate to audiences in-person and online what my music is like from the 1970s to today. There has not been enough time or a commissioning body to support the creation of new work, but the documentation online and in recordings might generate interest.
• Establish new partnerships with (potential) champions of my music.
• Spotlight champions of my music and celebrate them and their artistry. They know me better than most and will bring a degree of experience and passion to their performances.

As the producer/presenter

• Quality. Well-rehearsed performances. High-fidelity audio suitable for YouTube. Video suitable for editing and YouTube. 
• Pleasure. Audience members (in-person and online) enjoy themselves and feel engaged with the performers, host, music and host.

As the promoter

• Audience. 40 people at the live performance; 100 in attendance for the streaming performance; 1,000 YouTube visits by 2024.

As the host

• Informative. A script that leads the audience through an unfolding experience that is coherent, not too fast, nor too long. 
• Sense of inevitability. Provide an engaging experience for those with deep concert experience and those who bring only open ears and mind and an engaged heart. Script should have the appearance of effortless inevitability.
• Fun. Remember to entertain, to give credit, and to make it fun.

As the performer

• As little as possible. I’ll have all four of my hands fully employed. I hope not to perform…and completely aware that audiences may never know me as the composer because I am not making the sounds emanating from the stage. I’ll consider opportunities to play cello…if possible.

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PRODUCTION WORK
Brené Brown's Atlas of the Heart, again, itemizes 87 emotions which make it easier to include for consideration in the emoticard that will be handed out to the audience before the show. The list she creates is based on social science research but it leaves out some of the basics in practice of Baroque music. But first, here are her categories of emotions in list form:
Places we go...when things are uncertain or too much: Stress, Overwhelm, Anxiety, Worry, Avoidance, Excitement, Dread, Fear, Vulnerability
...when we compare: Comparison, Admiration, Reverence, Envy, Jealousy, Resentment, Schadenfreude, Freundenfreude
...when things don't go as planned: Boredom, Disappointment, Expectations, Regret, Discouragement, Resignation, Frustration
...when it's beyond us: Awe, Wonder, Confusion, Curiosity, Interest, Surprise
...when things aren't what they seem: Amusement, Bittersweetness, Nostalgia, Cognitive Dissonance, Paradox, Irony, Sarcasm
...when we're hurting: Anguish, Hopelessness, Despair, Sadness, Grief
...where we go with others: Compassion, Pity, Empathy, Sympathy, Boundaries, Comparative Suffering
...where we go when we fall short: Shame, Self-Compassion, Perfectionism, Guilt, Humiliation, Embarassment
...where we go when we search for connection: Belonging, Fitting, Connection, Disconnection, Insecurity, Invisibility, Loneliness
...where we go when the heart is open: Love, Lovelessness, Heartbreak, Trust, Self-Trust, Betrayal, Defensiveness, Flooding, Hurt
...where we go when life is good: Joy, Happiness, Calm, Contentment, Gratitude, Foreboding Joy, Relief, Tranquility
...where we go when we feel wronged: Anger, Contempt, Disgust, Dehumanization, Hate, Self-Righteousness
...where we go to self-assess: Pride, Hubris, Humility